May 3, 2009

Oh, teenage hopes are alive at your door


I am soooo soooo tired! Today I went to junior-senior bowling in Bigfork, and I wore my civil war ball gown. It was fun walking in, and seeing everyone glance at me, do a double take, then try their hardest not to look anymore :) The guy at the counter asked me if I was really going to bowl in "that" and I said "of course I am!" He told me, "alright, rock and roll."

I haven't heard from the Conrad Mansion yet. I feel like my job interview went really well. They marked high numbers on their papers anyway! I found out my piano recital is on the seventeenth. After that I can definitely relax with music... since I'm performing both piano and choir at the convention the same weekend. I can't wait. OH how I can't wait!

A bunch of people went to the Dairy Queen in Kalispell after bowling... I kind of wanted to, but I decided, you know, it's not really worth it. I was just there yesterday--and they'll close soon too (the reason nobody went to the DQ in Bigfork was because it was already closed). I'm so happy that I'm learning lessons like that. I'm not trying to convince myself that "this time it will be different, this time people will talk to me and I'll have fun, this time it will be different." I just trust myself. If it feels like it won't be worth it, it probably won't be worth it. So I skip it.

Becki loaned me a book called Flabbergasted. It's by Ray Blackston. So far, I really like it--he uses cool writing styles, such as this: "Tuesday evening while grilling chicken on my deck, I was thinking of brass plates and women, of women and brass plates, and wondered if contributing to that plate would hurry God up as far as meeting the right one. I flipped the chicken over, sprinkled it with lemon pepper, and thought maybe dropping two twenties in the plate would help me meet her this year, or a hundred bucks and we'd meet within a month, or five hundred and the person would arrive in warp speed, like Spock to Captain Kirk."
At the beginning of the chapter the author quoted Woody Allen: "ninety percent of life is just showing up." I had to pause on that thought for a minute while I read--it's true, isn't it? You don't really determine how much "happens" to you. You just go where you're supposed to and wait for it to come to you.

Tomorrow I have a piano lesson--BUT I get to come home in between that and BSF. Ahhhh the bliss and luxury of not having to stay in town. Now, if I only knew what to wear...

"And then, we saw a fifth leg sticking out of the fat mother cow..." --Josh Daley while describing a calf's birth

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