September 16, 2009

I loved you first, I loved you first

I made banana bread today. Just for fun. I must be losing it. I was just making a smoothie for breakfast and I saw these extremely overripe bananas, and I thought, "you know what I want to make today? Banana bread." And then I just got this really weird craving to clean the kitchen so I did the dishes and washed all the counters, just so I could make banana bread! Just so I could dirty the kitchen and dirty more dishes! I am turning into a MOM! (look of shock and horror)

Yesterday I had a dentist appointment with Dr. Colonna in Whitefish... the one thing I noticed about him is that when he came into the room, he immediately started talking to ME, not my mom. I appreciated that. I am the patient, and I deserve some say (although my mom ultimately has the checkbook! hahaha). He shook my hand and asked me how old I am, and then he said, "Wanna date my son? He's 17." I said sure. Overall, the atmosphere of his office was friendly and entirely un-pushy. well... almost entirely. The hygienist was positive I have to do this whitening process because as an adolescent my teeth are yellower and if I decide later in life that I want to whiten my teeth, I won't be able to, because the implant will be made specifically to match the color of my teeth... and on and on she went. Then when Dr. Colonna came in, he said, "oh, you can do that if you want, but you certainly don't have to. I don't think you need it." And I wanted to stick my tongue out at Miss Priss the Hygienist.

My senior pictures are scheduled for the 30th. I'm nervous, excited, and... well... I don't know. I don't want to grow up. I don't want to become an adult and have adult responsibilities... and I don't want to have to take care of myself when I'm sick. And I never NEVER want to be alone at night. The pictures will be nice, but.... couldn't I just freeze time? =\

September 7, 2009

Mr. President

here is an interesting excerpt from my American Government curriculum. (Alpha Omega LIFEPACS, grade 12.)

Possibly one of the most powerful passages that teaches us about our attitude towards our president and the ruling authorities comes from Romans 13:1-7. In it Christians are instructed to submit to the authorities of their countries since, according to verse 1, God has established these authorities. Verse 2 says that rebelling against the government is rebelling against the authority that God has allowed. There are some Christians who feel that a non-Christian president in office will nullify the obligation for obedience, but Romans chapter 13 tells us that we should obey not only to avoid punishment, but also to have a good conscience before God. The Bible allows Christians to be involved in their country's government, including working to suppress legislation that defames God or contradicts the Bible. However, the Christian should be aware that submitting to authority, be it county judge or even a Presidential enactment, is a testimony to the Lord. Each Christian must be wise and use discernment in this area.

1Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. 3For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you. 4For he is God's servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God's servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. 5Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also because of conscience. 6This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God's servants, who give their full time to governing. 7Give everyone what you owe him: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor. (Romans 13:1-7, NIV)

September 6, 2009

you are my sweetest downfall

I'm working on He's the Question right now. Most frustrating song I've ever had to deal with, but I'm not mad. I'm not getting mad. I'm nowhere near mad. It's hard enough writing piano music for it, but trombone and drums too?! I don't even play those instruments! How the heck am I supposed to know how to write for them?? I have a new system of song-writing, though, since it's easier to write at my piano rather than my computer--I print off the song before I even start (so all you see is the title and my name and a bunch of blank measures) and take it down to the piano for the rough draft. Putting it in my computer is when I have to do the technical stuff like measures and rhythm. I don't understand how ANYBODY, genius or not, could compose at age 3!

Then again, I have everything I need. I have the tools (the laptop, the proper composing program, the keyboard), I have the capacity (beginning my sixth year of piano, preparing for my senior recital in the spring AND teaching 3 students of my own), I have the time (well, kind of)... I have the motivation (Jonathan is going to give me stickers). So, why not write a musical and rock at it? I can do it, so why don't I? Why don't I set my heart on it? Is it fear? I'm tired of not being brave and jumping at opportunities!!

September 2, 2009

for the teenage boys, they're breaking your heart

That's the last line of the song. Now I have to find a new song to use for the titles of my blogs :)
Today was a good day. The UPS guy brought my brand-spanking-new Lenovo laptop (which I am blogging from right now) at about 11:19 AM, and as I was going down the stairs to get it, my mom told me I look skinny today. That made me pretty happy. (By the way, she is informally christened "Lappy" after Strong Bad and the Homestarmy.)

I didn't have to do science today because I did today's science yesterday. Then, today, I did tomorrow's American Government! I'm trying to make it a habit to stay up to date and even ahead in my school, because I know once the year gets underway... if I don't have a good system, a good routine, I'm sunk. I guess I just get so busy and discouraged that when I have the time, I'm not energetic enough to make the effort to finish. It's a sick, endless cycle.

I helped my mom can about five pounds of beans this afternoon, and we're not done yet. We have another six pounds to go! That's all the pounds we didn't manage to sell at market on Saturday! It was nice to just chat with her and snap beans.

My iPod is syncing right now. This computer is just way too much fun :) the keyboard makes a satisfying sound when you type and it feels good. I wonder if typing is considered a repetitive activity that releases endorphins. hmmmm... interesting thing to find out, hey?

So yesterday our car died on the way to Foys lake. We almost had to walk two miles uphill, loaded down with towels and bags and one cooler full of Sobes. My mom tried to call a few people and while she did I ended up holding her stuff and my stuff... I joked to her that I must've looked like her personal slave, toting all the stuff while she breezily chatted on her cell phone. It was a fun adventure. Miss Ann rescued us though, so we didn't have to walk the whole way.

I started Spanish again. It's kind of weird, starting all over but sort of remembering all the stuff I already learned. We'll see how it goes... this is my senior year. I just have to finish all the stuff I've started!

Well, I'd better go. I'm syncing my iPod with this computer, and I still have to install a few things. (Like PrintMusic 3000! Yay!)

Learn to be lonely. Life can be lived, life can be loved alone.